We take a brief reprieve from expensive, exotic mistresses you’ll never have to something some of our older readers might have actually owned. We shall therefore use big text so they can read it: LOOK AT THE SEARS AND ROEBUCK SPACELINER, OLD PEOPLE!

It’s a rather astounding ride and a testament to style over everything. The bikes weighed in just shy of a metric ton and used up enough steel to build a skyscraper, but quite frankly, that wasn’t the point. The reason for the Spaceliner was to make something beautiful, plain and simple. It’s the cycling equivalent of big fins on 50’s cars, or oodles of chrome on Harleys. The style is the substance, and there’s something poetic in that. Something rather perfect.

The Spaceliner goes for a few hundred bucks on the Internets and might fetch a bit more for a cyclists fantasizing about better, younger days. WE ARE TALKING ABOUT YOU, OLD PEOPLE! You really had it good.